Well guys, it's done and over-with. I must say, this time around, the project has been a lot more rushed, but at the same time, it's also been a lot more time to blog. Seriously, I've posted something like 15 posts verses the seven or eight from last year.
I'll miss you all! Who knows? Maybe next year I'll have another project where I have to blog. Then, the BLOGAVAD GITA SHALL RETURN!
Goodbye everybody!
Stay Swaggy.
Friday, April 4, 2014
The DoneWith Horror
It's OVER! OVER I TELLS YAH! OVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!
SO, at the end of the Dunwich Horror, we learned a lot. Things really picked up and shiites hit the fan. Not in a racist way. At the end of the story, our favorite giant (No offense Andre) Wilbur Whateley travels down to Rhode Island to Miskatonic University. Upon arrival, he breaks into the library and immediately starts to search for the Necronomicon. Unfortunately for Wilbur, a vicious attack dog sees him breaking in and promptly rips out his jugular vein. Damn. That was quick. So long Wilbur. So, although it was sad to see Wilbur go, it was actually A LOT worse for those back in Dunwich. Remember Wilbur's twin brother? The one that was four times his size? Yeah.... he wasn't so happy about "Feeling" his brother die. So... he decided to run down from his hilltop house to Dunwich and begin to terrorize.
For an entire week The Dunwich Horror terrorizes Dunwich, murdering families, eating cows, pigs, and generally just being a dick. I mean seriously, what kind of guy just eats people AND cows AND pigs? That's not even kosher!
Well, anyway, back at the University, Dr. Armitage, a character from past Lovecraft stories hears about what's happening in Dunwich and realizes somehow that it is related to Yog-Sothoth. He heads down to Dunwich and the showdown begins. And... for once... he succeeds! This marks one of the first times that a protagonist has won out over an antagonist in a Lovecraft story. It's a landmark! Woohoo! Great for the residents of Dunwich (save for all the families and animals that got eaten).
Overall, this story was pretty good. Not Lovecraft's very best work, but it gave an insight into the mythos that a lot of his other stories didn't. It made the Necronomicon have a use and made Yog-Sothoth more formidable of an old god so that he is comparable to Nyarlathotep, Cthulhu, and all the other Old God friends.
This marks the end my friends. That's it. We're done.
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| He looks like a Hippy in this picture |
SO, at the end of the Dunwich Horror, we learned a lot. Things really picked up and shiites hit the fan. Not in a racist way. At the end of the story, our favorite giant (No offense Andre) Wilbur Whateley travels down to Rhode Island to Miskatonic University. Upon arrival, he breaks into the library and immediately starts to search for the Necronomicon. Unfortunately for Wilbur, a vicious attack dog sees him breaking in and promptly rips out his jugular vein. Damn. That was quick. So long Wilbur. So, although it was sad to see Wilbur go, it was actually A LOT worse for those back in Dunwich. Remember Wilbur's twin brother? The one that was four times his size? Yeah.... he wasn't so happy about "Feeling" his brother die. So... he decided to run down from his hilltop house to Dunwich and begin to terrorize.
 |
| Learn it Mr. Horror |
Well, anyway, back at the University, Dr. Armitage, a character from past Lovecraft stories hears about what's happening in Dunwich and realizes somehow that it is related to Yog-Sothoth. He heads down to Dunwich and the showdown begins. And... for once... he succeeds! This marks one of the first times that a protagonist has won out over an antagonist in a Lovecraft story. It's a landmark! Woohoo! Great for the residents of Dunwich (save for all the families and animals that got eaten).
Overall, this story was pretty good. Not Lovecraft's very best work, but it gave an insight into the mythos that a lot of his other stories didn't. It made the Necronomicon have a use and made Yog-Sothoth more formidable of an old god so that he is comparable to Nyarlathotep, Cthulhu, and all the other Old God friends.
This marks the end my friends. That's it. We're done.
Thursday, April 3, 2014
The Dun Dun Dun Wich Horror
Dun Dun DUUUUUUUN. It's Wilbur Whateley! The main character and Antagonist of The Dunwich Horror!
Essentially, the plot of the story is that Lavinia Whateley, an old albino woman from the fictional town of Dunwich, Massachusetts is raped by an unseen force and gives birth to twins. One of them is Wilbur, a boy that grows to be five feet by the time he is five and fourteen feet by the time he is fifteen. What the Hell? I'm fifteen! Imagine if someone like me was fourteen feet tall! Imagine what that Jew Nose would look like on me! It would be like a foot long! Five dollar foot long (If I was going to continue making Jew Jokes I would have probably touched the fact that five dollars isn't that much money, but I'm not, because I'm a good Jew)! But I digress.
Anyway, Wilbur's grandfather soon disappears and his mother if found eaten in their barn soon after. It turns out that Wilbur's twin brother, whom they kept in the barn all of it's life because he was four times the size of Wilbur and had cloven hoofs had gotten out. Wilbur suddenly realizes what he must do as a vision of Yog-Sothoth appears before him. He must travel to the Miskatonic University in Rhode Island and retrieve the Necronomicon, an ancient book of incantations. From there, he must summon Yog-Sothoth, whom he realizes is the one that raped his mother so that she gave birth to such horrifying children.
That's where I am!
So far, this book is pretty classic Lovecraft. Old Gods, deformities, and lots of fear running rampant all over. It's basically what I've come to expect from him at this point. The best thing about reading more Lovecraft however, is that as you read more of him, you learn more about the Cthulhu mythos and get more and more immersed in it.
One more post guys! Let's keep this goin'! It may be up by tonight!
Soon my friends, soon.
 |
| The Necronomicon is actually just Scientologist Propaganda |
Essentially, the plot of the story is that Lavinia Whateley, an old albino woman from the fictional town of Dunwich, Massachusetts is raped by an unseen force and gives birth to twins. One of them is Wilbur, a boy that grows to be five feet by the time he is five and fourteen feet by the time he is fifteen. What the Hell? I'm fifteen! Imagine if someone like me was fourteen feet tall! Imagine what that Jew Nose would look like on me! It would be like a foot long! Five dollar foot long (If I was going to continue making Jew Jokes I would have probably touched the fact that five dollars isn't that much money, but I'm not, because I'm a good Jew)! But I digress.
Anyway, Wilbur's grandfather soon disappears and his mother if found eaten in their barn soon after. It turns out that Wilbur's twin brother, whom they kept in the barn all of it's life because he was four times the size of Wilbur and had cloven hoofs had gotten out. Wilbur suddenly realizes what he must do as a vision of Yog-Sothoth appears before him. He must travel to the Miskatonic University in Rhode Island and retrieve the Necronomicon, an ancient book of incantations. From there, he must summon Yog-Sothoth, whom he realizes is the one that raped his mother so that she gave birth to such horrifying children.
 |
| But a Nose |
So far, this book is pretty classic Lovecraft. Old Gods, deformities, and lots of fear running rampant all over. It's basically what I've come to expect from him at this point. The best thing about reading more Lovecraft however, is that as you read more of him, you learn more about the Cthulhu mythos and get more and more immersed in it.
One more post guys! Let's keep this goin'! It may be up by tonight!
Soon my friends, soon.
The Reading Project Horror
FINAL BOOK BABY! WOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOO MOTHAFRUCKAS! YEAH! ONE MORE!
First, before talking about this last book, I'd like to write a quick letter to Mr. Perlman, the one who started this whole project all those weeks ago.
Mr. Perlman,
YOU ARE AWESOME! I NEVER WOULD HAVE FINISHED ANOTHER BOOK IN ONE DAY! YOU LET ME READ A SHORT STORY AS MY LAST BECAUSE YOU ARE THE COOLEST! I WILL SACRIFICE A GOAT IN YOUR HONOR!
~~~~ Max
Sorry, I had to get that out of my system. In case you didn't get it from that little letter, I get to just read a short story as my last project. Since I recently read Lovecraft's At the Mountains of Madness, I decided to continue to the trend and read his novelette, "The Dunwich Horror". Aren't his names just the most uplifting? So, I haven't started reading yet, but from what I gather from other Lovecraft tales that mention the Dunwich Horror, it is a large monstrosity related the Old God Yog-Sothoth. I feel like that would be a difficult name to get by in life with. Kids would make fun of it, teachers would mispronounce it, and job interviews would just be awkward. "Yes... Mr. Sothoth? Or is it Yog? Can I just call you Soth?" Oy Givalt. I shudder just thinking about that. Although Yog-Sothoth Benowitz could be a funny name. Some kind of crossbreed between Jew and... um.... I couldn't follow up that joke because I have no idea what ethnicity Yog-Sothoth would be. German? Maybe? Whatever, I don't have the time to try to figure this out. I must go read.
Soon I'll actually tell you the plot!
I'll be writing more quite soon!
First, before talking about this last book, I'd like to write a quick letter to Mr. Perlman, the one who started this whole project all those weeks ago.
 |
| MY LIFE FOR LORD PERLMAN! SACRIFICE! |
YOU ARE AWESOME! I NEVER WOULD HAVE FINISHED ANOTHER BOOK IN ONE DAY! YOU LET ME READ A SHORT STORY AS MY LAST BECAUSE YOU ARE THE COOLEST! I WILL SACRIFICE A GOAT IN YOUR HONOR!
~~~~ Max
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| Yog-Sothoth... Now picture that with Payis and a Keepah |
Soon I'll actually tell you the plot!
I'll be writing more quite soon!
I Miss the Mist
It is over. It is done. It is... not actually done because I have to read one more book in one more day. All that drama that evolved in the first two sentences are fake. HA! You totally fell for it.
So in the last hundred or so pages of The Mist, we learn a little more about what caused everything. Apparently, the army was trying something called "Project Arrowhead", opening a gateway to another dimension where these monsters came from. Back in the Supermarket, characters begin to die left and right. Some are convinced it's the apocalypse, some want to kill themselves, and some just want to party harty, cause Fun is on their mind. Drayton makes friends with a young woman and an Old Man and they decide to drive out into the Mist to try and find out what's goin on (As it turns out, they are all listening to Prince Adam). Once safe inside the car, the four of them drive out into the distance, witnessing terrible creatures all around. They find out that Drayton's wife has died, and just as they are driving back, quite depressed, they see a massive five hundred foot tall alien. Having just read At the Mountains of Madness, I'm pretty accustomed this kind of "giant monster roaming around" trope. Luckily, it doesn't step on them, and they ride out into the distance once more, not knowing where they are going. One might say that they Don't know where they've come from, and they don't know where they've been (More music references! MUhahahahahaha).
So that's how it ended. They drove out into the distance and it ended. A lot less climactic than the movie. In that, Drayton shoots his companions so that they don't have to die in a worse way. Then, just to put the icing on the cake of sadness, the army shows up and clears away the mist in the area. Though depressing, this was a better ending. It was more bold and more worthy of the rest of the story. To be perfectly honest, I was a little disappointed in the ending we got. Then again, Lovin, is what I got (Music reference number... 4? 5?).
So, next up is... I have no idea. Something short. Something sweet. Something easy to read. Either way, you'll still have to hear me (or read me) for another day or two. Keep checking back. It's not over yet laddies!
 |
| His wife died! Just like poor old innocent OJ |
So in the last hundred or so pages of The Mist, we learn a little more about what caused everything. Apparently, the army was trying something called "Project Arrowhead", opening a gateway to another dimension where these monsters came from. Back in the Supermarket, characters begin to die left and right. Some are convinced it's the apocalypse, some want to kill themselves, and some just want to party harty, cause Fun is on their mind. Drayton makes friends with a young woman and an Old Man and they decide to drive out into the Mist to try and find out what's goin on (As it turns out, they are all listening to Prince Adam). Once safe inside the car, the four of them drive out into the distance, witnessing terrible creatures all around. They find out that Drayton's wife has died, and just as they are driving back, quite depressed, they see a massive five hundred foot tall alien. Having just read At the Mountains of Madness, I'm pretty accustomed this kind of "giant monster roaming around" trope. Luckily, it doesn't step on them, and they ride out into the distance once more, not knowing where they are going. One might say that they Don't know where they've come from, and they don't know where they've been (More music references! MUhahahahahaha).
 |
| The 500 foot monster was actually just Andre the Giant |
So that's how it ended. They drove out into the distance and it ended. A lot less climactic than the movie. In that, Drayton shoots his companions so that they don't have to die in a worse way. Then, just to put the icing on the cake of sadness, the army shows up and clears away the mist in the area. Though depressing, this was a better ending. It was more bold and more worthy of the rest of the story. To be perfectly honest, I was a little disappointed in the ending we got. Then again, Lovin, is what I got (Music reference number... 4? 5?).
So, next up is... I have no idea. Something short. Something sweet. Something easy to read. Either way, you'll still have to hear me (or read me) for another day or two. Keep checking back. It's not over yet laddies!
Wednesday, April 2, 2014
The Midst of the Mist
When I party, I party harty. Fun is on my miiiind. Put a smile, on your face, leave that problem behind! OH WAIT! THERE'S GIANT MONSTERS RUNNING THROUGH THE STREETS OF NEW ENGLAND KILLING EVERYONE! WHAT THE FLUCK!
That is how I would describe the Mist. One moment, I'm listening to Fun, by Sly and the Family Stone and hearing about David Drayton, the lovable dad and husband who works as an artist, and the next moment, Drayton and his son are holed up in a supermarket hiding from Lovecraft Villains. What the hell?! HOW DID THIS CHANGE SO FAST? WHERE DID ALL OF THE GOOD TIMES GO?! They certainly didn't roll Mr. O'casek.
Basically, we meet David Drayton, a graphic artist, his eight year old son, and his wife. Drayton and his son go out to the market where mysteriously, there is a large number of citizens of their town holed up. We learn that there was storm last night and that sounds have been heard throughout the day. All of a sudden, just when we think, "Oh ok, it's just some random sounds because of trees falling over and stuff", we see a GIANT TENTACLE PULL A BUSBOY OUT OF THE MARKET! HUH? WHAT?
Anyway, A Mist (Shocker) soon develops around the market obscuring all vision. We soon start to meet the other characters in the market, including the manager, two soldiers, a young woman, and an older man. That could be the plot of an adult film. All of these characters start to either form good relationships or conflicts with each other. Tension starts to rise and a few more deaths come about.
That's about where I am right now. On the bright side however, I think I'm going to finish this by tonight. I'm still debating whether or not to read a fifth book, but if I do, it will be really short. Maybe Animal Farm for a second time? Maybe Frog and Toad? Oooh, that one sounds nice. One more post of The Mist and then it's Frog and Toad time!
See ya soon!
That is how I would describe the Mist. One moment, I'm listening to Fun, by Sly and the Family Stone and hearing about David Drayton, the lovable dad and husband who works as an artist, and the next moment, Drayton and his son are holed up in a supermarket hiding from Lovecraft Villains. What the hell?! HOW DID THIS CHANGE SO FAST? WHERE DID ALL OF THE GOOD TIMES GO?! They certainly didn't roll Mr. O'casek.
 |
| Spoiler Alert: There's Mist |
Basically, we meet David Drayton, a graphic artist, his eight year old son, and his wife. Drayton and his son go out to the market where mysteriously, there is a large number of citizens of their town holed up. We learn that there was storm last night and that sounds have been heard throughout the day. All of a sudden, just when we think, "Oh ok, it's just some random sounds because of trees falling over and stuff", we see a GIANT TENTACLE PULL A BUSBOY OUT OF THE MARKET! HUH? WHAT?
Anyway, A Mist (Shocker) soon develops around the market obscuring all vision. We soon start to meet the other characters in the market, including the manager, two soldiers, a young woman, and an older man. That could be the plot of an adult film. All of these characters start to either form good relationships or conflicts with each other. Tension starts to rise and a few more deaths come about.
 |
| Frog and Toad: Straight up G's |
That's about where I am right now. On the bright side however, I think I'm going to finish this by tonight. I'm still debating whether or not to read a fifth book, but if I do, it will be really short. Maybe Animal Farm for a second time? Maybe Frog and Toad? Oooh, that one sounds nice. One more post of The Mist and then it's Frog and Toad time!
See ya soon!
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
The Pissed Mist
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand we're back, for the fourth time. It is time to read The Mist, a novella by Stephen King. Though at first thought, you'd probably say, "Max, what the hell, you're reading a novella? Loser!", think again! Since The Mist is by Stephen King, it is considered a novella, but still weighs in at around 250 pages. Yeah... totally a novella Stephen.
Anyway, I haven't actually picked up the book yet (Probably going to start as soon as I finish this AP euro essay and write this post... so at like 3:00 AM), but I've actually seen the movie made by Frank Darabont based on the Novel(la). First off, I'll preface by saying that I am a major Stephen King fan (It is in my humble opinion that The Dark Tower series are the greatest books ever). In addition, I really enjoyed the movie, so much so that I thought it would be fun to actually read the book to find out exactly how accurate the movie is, and whether it fits the mold of always being worse than the book (Cough, The Hobbit, Cough).
Essentially, the plot of the story is that a mysterious gate to another world is opened up in a small town, and a gang on survivors hole up in a market to try and find safety from the monsters roaming outside. A gaggle of characters are introduced and many of them die from varying circumstances. It is kind of a classic horror movie formula (lots of characters, pick them off one by one), but with King's twist on things, they are not at all cliches, and most of the characters are highly intriguing, instead of the same old paradigm that most horror movies fit into.
Since this project ends on Friday, I really have a lot of reading to do. Ideally, I'd have five books done by that point (right now I have three done), so getting there is going to be an uphill battle. I'll definitely have The Mist done by that point, but whether I read another is still up in the air. Either way, keep checking back for the last posts!
Until next time!
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| 200 page book, 3 three hour movies. Yeah, that makes sense |
Essentially, the plot of the story is that a mysterious gate to another world is opened up in a small town, and a gang on survivors hole up in a market to try and find safety from the monsters roaming outside. A gaggle of characters are introduced and many of them die from varying circumstances. It is kind of a classic horror movie formula (lots of characters, pick them off one by one), but with King's twist on things, they are not at all cliches, and most of the characters are highly intriguing, instead of the same old paradigm that most horror movies fit into.
 | |
| I want to finish two books in three days! And people in hell want Ice Water... |
Since this project ends on Friday, I really have a lot of reading to do. Ideally, I'd have five books done by that point (right now I have three done), so getting there is going to be an uphill battle. I'll definitely have The Mist done by that point, but whether I read another is still up in the air. Either way, keep checking back for the last posts!
Until next time!
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